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 LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!

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Corazón Roto
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:17 am

"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
- Douglas Adams
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Corazón Roto
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:17 am

"Far back in the mists of ancient time, in the great and glorious days of the former Galactic Empire, life was wild, rich and largely tax free.
Mighty starships plied their way between exotic suns, seeking adventure and reward among the furthest reaches of Galactic space. In those days, spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri. And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before -- and thus was the Empire forged."
- Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:18 am

"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."
- Douglas Adams
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:18 am

"Practical politics consists in ignoring facts."
- Henry Adams
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:19 am

"If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done."
- Scott Adams
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Corazón Roto
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:19 am

"Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep."
- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:20 am

"As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line."
- Scott Adams, creator of "Dilbert" on the ending of the strip "Calvin and Hobbes"
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:20 am

Dear Mr. Adams,
Where do all of your ideas come from? -Nathan
Dear Nothin,
Mr. Adams gets most of his ideas while in the shower. The bathroom door is closed when it happens, so there are two possible sources. Either the ideas are contained in the clean, chlorinated water that comes from the showerhead, or they emanate from the public sewer system and waft up through the drain. Judging from the quality of Mr. Adams' ideas, I think we can rule out the showerhead.
Sincerely, Dogbert
Scott Adams - Dilbert
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Corazón Roto
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:21 am

"The reason why Absurdist plays take place in No Man's Land with only two characters is primarily financial."
- Arther Adamov - Russian-born French dramatist
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:22 am

"An infallible method of conciliating a tiger is to allow oneself to be devoured."
- Konrad Adenauer
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:22 am

"When I saw a sign on the freeway that said, "Los Angeles 445 miles," I said to myself, "I've got to get out of this lane."
- Franklyn Ajaye
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:23 am

"The shortest distance between two points is always under construction."
- Noelie Alite
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:23 am

"Statistics have shown that mortality increases in the military during wartime."
- Alphonse Allais
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:23 am

"Imitation is the sincerest form of television."
- Fred Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:24 am

"You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a firefly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart."
- Fred Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:24 am

"A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on."
- Fred Allen - Comedian
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:25 am

"A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done."
- Fred Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:25 am

"It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it."
- Henry Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:25 am

"What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?"
- Woody Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:26 am

"I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown."
- Woody Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:26 am

"Why are our days numbered and not, say lettered?"
- Woody Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:27 am

"In California they don't throw their garbage away -- they make it into television shows."
- Woody Allen, "Annie Hall'
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:27 am

"I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No'."
- Woody Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:27 am

"Death is an acquired trait."
- Woody Allen
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PostSubject: Re: LIST YOUR BEST QUOTES HERE!!   Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:28 am

"If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss Bank."
- Woody Allen
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