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 A Place To Smile and Laugh

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AuthorMessage
Eddy
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 490
Location : Eeeepo Road KL
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Wed Dec 12, 2007 1:10 pm

Hallo kengkawan... nia ada teka teki....

Siapa betul dia dapat... dapat jawab dengan betul lah... heheheh

'Pisau potong daging, Daging potong _________'....
ha kengkawan sila jawab... daging potong apa?
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tcleo13
marshall
marshall


Number of posts : 80
Location : Setapak, KL
Registration date : 14/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Wed Dec 12, 2007 4:44 pm

Father: "I want you to marry a girl of my choice"
Son : "I will choose my own bride!"
Father : "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter."
Son : "Well, in that case... ok"

Next - Father approaches Bill Gates.
Father : "I have a husband for your daughter."
Bill Gates : "But my daughter is too young to marry!"
Father : "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."
Bill Gates : "Ah, in that case... ok"


Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Father : "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president. "
President : "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"
Father : "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."
President : "Ah, in that case... ok"

This is how business is done!!
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samson
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 119
Location : OUG
Registration date : 17/10/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Wed Dec 12, 2007 4:54 pm

Eddy wrote:
Hallo kengkawan... nia ada teka teki....

Siapa betul dia dapat... dapat jawab dengan betul lah... heheheh

'Pisau potong daging, Daging potong _________'....
ha kengkawan sila jawab... daging potong apa?

Daging potong stim la...pe lagi.......hehehehehheeh
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hafizazzim
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 521
Location : one step only
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Wed Dec 12, 2007 5:44 pm

samson wrote:
Eddy wrote:
Hallo kengkawan... nia ada teka teki....

Siapa betul dia dapat... dapat jawab dengan betul lah... heheheh

'Pisau potong daging, Daging potong _________'....
ha kengkawan sila jawab... daging potong apa?

Daging potong stim la...pe lagi.......hehehehehheeh

salah la samson.....daging potong taik la.... lol! lol! lol!
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Eddy
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 490
Location : Eeeepo Road KL
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Thu Dec 13, 2007 12:20 pm

Bang Fizan... eksplen skit jawapan tuh.... thanks
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Batin
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 217
Location : Sentulrion
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Mon Dec 17, 2007 1:35 am

lol! lol! lol!
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hafizazzim
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 521
Location : one step only
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Fri Dec 28, 2007 4:31 pm

Dalam keheningam malam penuh syahdu, a ramli masuk kekamar kerana mengantuk.(kemungkinan ada juga rasa yg lain - paham2 je lah.. pengantin baru! ) Dilihat isterinya sudah berselimut dari hujung rambut ke hujung kaki. "Malu agaknya. Maklumlah malam pertama..." bisik hati a ramli.

Dimatikanya lampu dan ia pun berbaring di katil. Dicelah2 saura kodok menyeru pasangannya, terdengar suara isteri berbisik, penuh romantis, "Buah papaya dah masak ranum, bila tupai nak datang merasa ?"
"Dah, apa citer ni ?" tanya Ramli dlm hati. Separuh malam dia terbaring berfikir. "Oh, agaknya isteri ku teringat kampung halaman.. sian.. sampai mengigau? Takpelah, biarlah dia tidur" bisik hatinya penuh understanding.

Mlm ke 2 adegan yg sama cuma dialognya agak berbeza. Bisik isteri "Sawah bendang dah siap dibajak, bila pak tani nak turun menyemai?" "kesiannya bini aku.. masih ngigau lagi.. aku mesti cari penawar !" Ramli bertekad.

Esok harinya, Ramli bercerita pada ayah yg kebetulan datang untuk bertanya khabar `pengantin baru' "Lah.." keluh ayah Ramli, "aku antar belajar sampai Universiti, benda cam ni pun kau tak paham?"

Ayahnya pun mula bercerita perihal adam & hawa, laila & majnun, romeo & juliet... (yg relevan untuk pegantin baru je!) Sepatah cakap orang putih "about the birds & the bees". "oh. cam tu." sengih ramli, "baru saya paham. Taulah apa nak buat malam ni!"

Malam yg sangat ditunggu2 ramli pun tiba... adegan sama dikamar tidur. cuma kali ini isterinya membisu seribu bahasa. "lah..
nape pulak senyap. takkan dia give up" tertanya2 si Ramli.

Setelah sekian lama tanpa suara dari isteri, Ramli pun ber! kata, "Dah lapar betul rasanya perut, boleh tupai datang merasa?" Malam dingin semakin sunyi.. tak jawab pun... "Kain pelikat dak disinsing rapi, boleh pak tani turun menyemai ?" pun..masih takde jawaban...
Ramli mencuba lagi.
"Juruterbang dah siap sedia... boleh pesawat turun mendarat ?"
Sayu sekali jawaban si isteri dari bawah selimut,

"Maaf tuan... Landasannya baru saje banjir...!"

Moral cerita :
Pada kaum lelaki - Kalau nak naik pelamin, jangan tunggu sampai cukup bulan. Nanti dah datang bulan kan rugi sendiri..kuikuikuikui.....
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hafizz
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 662
Location : Setapak, KL
Registration date : 26/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Fri Dec 28, 2007 11:08 pm

Banjir ka?.........tarak apa la pizan......kitab tajul muluk ade 99 cara....tu belum kita kamasutra india, cina dan omputih.....
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hafizazzim
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 521
Location : one step only
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Sun Jan 06, 2008 11:45 am

Untuk beberapa tahun, Ahmad Razlan telah mengadakan hubungan sulitdengan orang gajinya,Sutina ...Suatu hari, Sutina memberitahu Ahmad Razlan yang dirinya mengandung ...

Ahmad Razlan yang tidak mahu merosakkan perkahwinannya, telah
mengambil keputusan untuk menghantar Sutina balik ke Bandung untuk
melahirkan anak mereka di sana ...

Beliau berjanji akan menanggung segala kos untuk anak tersebut sehinggaanaknya nanti berusia 18 tahun ...

Supaya rahsia mereka berdua tidak terbongkar, Ahmad Razlan menyuruh Sutina supaya menghantarkan sekeping poskad dengan menulis perkataan "MeeBandung" dibelakangnya setelah anak mereka lahir nanti .. Ahmad Razlan akan menguruskan segala perbelanjaan untuk anaknya setelah mendapat poskad itu nanti ...

Suatu hari, 9 bulan selepas itu, ketika Ahmad Razlan pulang dari
kerja, isterinya Norzalina menegur Ahmad Razlan dengan muka yang keliru...

"Bang ... abang dapat poskad yang peliklah hari ni," kata Norzalina.

"Oh, tak pe ... bagi poskad tu kat Abang. Nanti abang jelaskan,"kata Ahmad Razlan.

Norzalina pun memberi poskad itu kepada Ahmad Razlan dan melihat Ahmad Razlan membaca poskad tersebut, sebelum muka Ahmad Razlan bertukar menjadi biru keungu -unguan dan terus pengsan!!

Poskad itu berbunyi ...

"Mee Bandung, Mee Bandung, Mee Bandung, Mee Bandung - 2 ada telur,2
tiada telur. Tolong hantarkan kuah lebih ya!"


p/s......cerita ini tiada kena mengena dengan insan yang bernama razlan samada yang dah kawin atau yang belum kawin lagiiii.....kuikuikuikuikuikui lol!
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qbee125
marshall
marshall


Number of posts : 84
Age : 35
Location : lumut , shah alam , sepanga
Registration date : 25/09/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Sun Jan 06, 2008 2:15 pm

HOW TO PROPERLY PLACE NEW EMPLOYEES
1. Put 400 bricks in a closed room.

2. Put your new hires in the room and close the
door.

3. Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours.

4. Then analyze the situation:

a. If they are counting the bricks , put them in
the Accounting Department.

b. If they are recounting them, put them in
Auditing.

c. If they have messed up the whole place with the
bricks, put them in Engineering .

d. If they are arranging the bricks in some
strange order, put them in Planning.

e. If they are throwing the bricks at each other,
put them in Operations.

f. If they are sleeping, put them in Security.

g. If they have broken the bricks into pieces, put
them in Information Technology.

h. If they are sitting idle, put them in Human
Resources.

i. If they say they have tried different
combinations , they are looking for more, yet not a
brick has been moved , put them in Sales.

j. If they have already left for the day , put
them in Marketing.

k. If they are staring out of the window , put
them in Strategic Planning .

l. If they are talking to each other, and not a
single brick has been moved, congratulate them and put
them in Top Management .
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hafizazzim
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 521
Location : one step only
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Wed Jan 09, 2008 7:37 pm

Seorang lelaki baru sahaja bertengkar dengan isterinya. Habis bertengkar, secara tiba - tiba sahaja isterinya terus mengemas barang - barangnya ke dalam beg.

Kenapa? Lelaki itu bertanya...

Isterinya berhenti sebentar. Dia merenung lelaki itu lalu berkata,
"kita sudah berkahwin lebih 15 tahun. Dalam masa itu, rumah ini x pernah aman asyik bertengkar saja. Saya sudah x tahan. Saya nak tinggalkan rumah ini"

Lelaki itu berfikir sebentar...Dia kemudian berlari ke dalam biliknya dan membawa sebuah beg pakaian.
"betul juga kata awak. Aku juga sudah x tahan dengan rumah ini. Aku nak ikut awak keluar dari rumah ini"
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lee VKings@Lanun troopers
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 345
Location : SIR DUNK,,,,ATAS TANAH BAWAH LANGIT
Registration date : 19/09/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:23 pm

CINTA MELAYU DAN MAT SALEH…..

TIJAH budak kampung,tapi kerja di KL.Biasalah bila dah duduk
'TOWN',mula lupa asal usul.Pakaian seksi maut,cinta pulak dgn lelaki mat saleh. Ke hulu ke hilir dok tayang boyfriendnya tu.Punyalah eksen si Tijah, hinggalah satu hari dia nampak lelaki Inggeris tadi kuar dgn wanita yg lagi cantik dan bergaya daripadanya.

Tijah menangis 3 hari 3 malam.Pada malam keempat,Tijah ambil sehelai
kertas dan tulis surat utk memutuskan hubungannya dengan lelaki mat
saleh tadi.Begini bunyi surat yg ditulis oleh Tijah...

John...

I WANT TO CUT CONNECTION US.I HAVE THINK ABOUT THIS VERY COOK-COOK.I
KNOW I CLAP ONE HAND ONLY.CORRECTLY,I HAVE SEEN YOU AND SHE WALK-WALK
TOGETHER AT TOWN WITH EYES MYSELF.YOU GRAB HAND SHE.YOU ALWAYS ASK
FOR APOLOGY BACK-BACK.I DON'T TRUST YOU AGAIN!!! YOU ARE REALLY CROCODILE LAND.

MY FRIEND SPEAK YOU PLAY WOOD THREE.FIRST-FIRST I THINK MY FRIEND LIE
ME.BUT NOW I KNOW YOU CORRECT-CORRECT PLAY WOOD THREE.SO, I BREAK
CONNECTION TO PULL MY BODY FROM THIS LOVE TRIANGLE.
I KNOW THIS RESULT
I PICK IS VERY CORRECT, BECAUSE YOU LOVE SHE VERY HIGH FROM ME.SO, I
CUT THIS CONNECTION TO GO FAR FROM HERE.I DON'T WANT YOU TO PLAY-PLAY
WITH MY LIVER.I HAVE BEEN CRYING UNTIL NO MORE EYE WATER THINKING ABOUT
YOU.I DON’T WANT BANANA TO FRUIT TWO TIMES.

SAFE WALK...

TIJAH.

Razz Razz
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safwan
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 233
Location : kg kapten kapal
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Fri Jan 11, 2008 6:21 pm

keh..keh kuarang pelajaran tahap cipan nih.... Very Happy
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cikguzam
prospect
prospect


Number of posts : 6
Registration date : 18/10/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:32 pm

[b]What to say..... May i compare thee to a summers day
so young and temperate
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Bulk23
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 330
Age : 71
Location : Ipoh - KL - Ipoh
Registration date : 15/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Tue Jan 15, 2008 2:05 pm

she was soo young
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Bulk23
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 330
Age : 71
Location : Ipoh - KL - Ipoh
Registration date : 15/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Tue Jan 15, 2008 2:06 pm

I IS A COLLEGE STUDENT...HEHEHEHEHEEEE...........
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qbee125
marshall
marshall


Number of posts : 84
Age : 35
Location : lumut , shah alam , sepanga
Registration date : 25/09/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Wed Jan 16, 2008 1:57 pm

Why I fired my Secretary.

Last week was my birthday
and I didn't feel very well
waking up on that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast
hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
'Happy Birthday!',
and possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out,
she barely said good morning,
let alone
' Happy Birthday.'

I thought...

Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids...
They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast
and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low
and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office,
my secretary Jane said,
'Good Morning Boss,
and by the way
Happy Birthday ! '
It felt a little better
that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock ,
when Jane knocked on my door
and said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me.'
I said, 'Thanks, Jane,
that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day.
Let's go !'

We went to lunch.
But we didn't go
where we normally would go.
She chose instead at a quiet bistro
with a private table.
We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

On the way back to the office,
Jane said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office,
Do We ?'

I responded,
'I guess not.
What do you have in mind ?'
She said,
'Let's drop by my apartment,
it's just around the corner.'



After arriving at her apartment,
Jane turned to me and said,
' Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment.
I'll be right back.'
'Ok.' I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes,
she came out
carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed
by my wife,
my kids,
and dozens of my friends
and co-workers,
all singing 'Happy Birthday'.


And I just sat there...



On the couch...



Naked............ Shocked What a Face Laughing
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hafizazzim
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 521
Location : one step only
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Tue Jan 22, 2008 11:49 am

Seorang gadis membawa teman lelaki barunya yang berasal dari bandar pulang ke
kampung untuk diperkenalkan kepada neneknya.Setibanya ke rumah, si gadis terus
meluru masuk ke dapur dan memeluk neneknya. Lupa tentang teman lelakinya yang masih
di ruang tamu, si gadis tersebut terus berbual denganneneknya. Teman lelakinya terus
duduk di ruang tamu, sambil menantikan kekasihnya di dapur dia terpandang semangkuk
kecil kacang badam dan gajus di atas meja.Bosan menunggu, diapun terus mangambil
sebutir kacang, lalu memakannya.. setengah jam kemudian.. habis semangkuk kacang itu
dimakannya! Si gadis setelah puas berborak dengan neneknya baru teringat yang teman
lelakinya masih berada di ruang tamu. Lalu dia dan neneknya naik ke ruang tamu..
"Nenek, inilah teman lelaki saya yang katakan tadi.., Yang, minta maaf lupa nak
kenalkan dengan nenek tadi," kata si gadis.."Tak mengapa, saya pun nak minta maaf
dengan nenek, habis semangkuk kacang nenek saya habiskan.." kata pemuda itu pula.
"Itulah cu, cucu-cucu nenek ini suka berikan nenek coklat kacang, tapi nenek ni
bukannya ada gigi, jadi nenekpun hisaplah coklatnya tu sampai habis, kacangnya keras
jadi nenek letakkanlah dalam mangkuk tu..."
lol! lol! lol!

p/s: kepada geng yang bujang....berhati2 makan kacang dirumah bakal mak mentua.....kuikuikuikui
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samson
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 119
Location : OUG
Registration date : 17/10/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Thu Jan 24, 2008 9:10 am

Misunderstood....................
One day there was two friend Apek And Ali discussing about the newly launch Car..................

apek : itu potong zaka ada bagut ka ?

ali : manyak bagut..bila lu potong haa lu punya barang manyak bersih loo..

apek:?!! err..saya kawan ada cakap,potong zaka aaahh.. manyak ploblem..


ali : apa probrem ?
apek :manyak buang lui..lagi aahh..dia punya performance tatak bagut..
manyak cinang semputloh..

ali : cehh.. apek, lu apa celita.. saya suda lama potong..
tada apa problem.. bini saya manyak puas woo..
apek :lu mini puas sama itu potong zaka ka?

ali : ya la.. bila lu potong aahh.. lagi sedap maen woo..
lu lagi lambat pancut..

apek :???!!! err..lu punya 1.3 atau 1.5 ??

ali : ??!! woi apek cakap baik2 sikit ha.. saya punya 6 incila..

apek :??! tiu nia ma.. lu jgn maen2 haa.. mana ada potong zaka 6 inci..
ali : cilaka apek ni..nah tengok ( bukak sluar tunjuk tuttttt..)

apek : chee sin punya olang..gua tanya baik2 lu tunjuk lu punya lancau..

ali : abis.. lu tarak percaya..saya tunjuk la..

apek : saya tatak tanya sama lu punya lancau..
saya tanya lu pasal itu nasional car.. potong zaka..
molo punya olang..


ali : aiya.. apek.. lain kali lu sebut betul2 la..kasi susa saja..
bukan potong zaka la.. proton saga.. cinabeng btulla..

huahuahuahua....................

iklan nie x lulus utk siaran TV / RADIO hrp maklum........
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lee VKings@Lanun troopers
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 345
Location : SIR DUNK,,,,ATAS TANAH BAWAH LANGIT
Registration date : 19/09/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Thu Jan 24, 2008 9:15 am

INI APEK SAMA ALI HAH..! SAMA-SAMA MENGNGONG...!....KAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAK...... drunken drunken drunken
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lee VKings@Lanun troopers
roadkill
roadkill


Number of posts : 345
Location : SIR DUNK,,,,ATAS TANAH BAWAH LANGIT
Registration date : 19/09/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Thu Jan 24, 2008 9:28 am

AMARAN OLEH LANUN TROOPERS......., JGN AJAR BENDA YG NGARUT2 PADA WARIS KITA...... pirat Twisted Evil pirat

Satu hari si cucu pulang ke rumah daripada bermain-main lalu bertanyalah kepada datuknya...
Cucu: "Tok, tadi Dol cakap pelir... Pelir tu apa tok?." Terkejut datuknya. Tapi dengan selambanya dia berkata...

Datuk: "Pelir tu songkoklah, macam atuk pakai nih"
Cucu: "OOoooo macam tu.." kata si cucu.

Pada hari lain pula si cucu bertanya lagi
Cucu: "Tok, tadi Minah sebut pantat.. apa ke bendanya tu tok?"
Terkejut bukan kepalang datuknya. Tapi dengan selambanya jugak dia menjawab..
Datuk: "Alah...itu kain..yang emak kau pakai tu."

Satu hari yang lain pula si cucu bertanya lagi...
Cucu: "Tok, melancap tu apa?" Si datuk malas nak melayan lalu dikatakannya melancap tu makan nasi.

Akhirnya si cucu bertanya lagi .
Cucu: "Tok, memantat tu apa?"
Datuk: "..Alaah kau ni banyak sangat bertanya..memantat tu macam ayah dan mak kaulah... kerjanya menoreh."

Suatu hari yang datanglah Tok Penghulu berkunjung ke rumah kanak-kanak tu..selepas diberi salam beberapa kali lalu dijawap oleh kanak-kanak tu..
Tok Penghulu: "Datuk kau ada?"
Cucu: "Tak ada Tok Penghulu. Dia pergi kedai.. Naiklah Tok Penghulu."
Tok penghulu pun naik sambil mengipas-ngipas dengan songkoknya.
Lalu berkata budak itu...
Cucu: "Tok Penghulu, kalau , sangkutlah pelir tu kat dinding".
Terperanjat katak si Tok Penghulu tu...
Tok Penghulu: "Ehhh mana abang kau? "
Cucu: "Ada kat dapur tengah melancap"
Tok Penghulu: "... Kakak kau?"
Cucu: "..ada kat sungai tengah basuh pantat..banyak pantat dia kena basuh."
Tok Penghulu: "Mak ayah kau?
Cucu: "EEEh Tok Penghulu nih..., kan hari ni tak
hujan....memantatlah mereka."Lalu Tok Penghulu pun pengsan.
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qbee125
marshall
marshall


Number of posts : 84
Age : 35
Location : lumut , shah alam , sepanga
Registration date : 25/09/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Mon Jan 28, 2008 3:09 pm

Marty wakes up at home with a huge hangover.

He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first
thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of
water on the side table.

He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him,
all clean and pressed.

Marty looks around the room and sees that it is in a
perfect order, spotless, clean. So's the rest of the
house.

He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table
"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go
shopping. Love you."

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a
hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is
also at the table, eating.

Marty asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk

and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the
hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you
stumbled into the door."

Confused, Marty asks, "So, why is everything in order
and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting
for me?"

His son replies, "Oh that! Mom dragged you to the
bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off,
you said,

"Lady, leave me alone, I'm married!"
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hafizazzim
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 521
Location : one step only
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Fri Feb 15, 2008 2:50 pm

Pintu bilik dibuka dengan kuat dan mengejutkan sepasang suami isteri yang
sedang tidur nyeyak... Seorang lelaki dengan wajah garang mengacukan
senjata tajam ke arah si isteri....

Perompak : "Sebelum kamu mati kubunuh, sebutkan namamu!"
Isteri : "Na... nama sa... saya... Aisyah"
Perompak : "Aisyah? nampaknya sama dengan nama ibuku. Aku tidak boleh
membunuhmu," lalu dia mendekati si suami dan sambil mengacukan senjatanya
ia berkata, Perompak : "Sebutkan namamu. Aku mesti tahu nama setiap orang
yang menjadi korbanku."
Suami : "Namaku kamal.. tapi.... semua orang memanggilku Aisyah...."


lol! lol! lol!
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qbee125
marshall
marshall


Number of posts : 84
Age : 35
Location : lumut , shah alam , sepanga
Registration date : 25/09/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Mon Mar 03, 2008 2:20 pm

Heaven or Hell?



While walking down the street one day a Malaysian politician is tragically
hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and he is met by an
angel at the entrance.

"Welcome to heaven," says the angel. "Before you settle in, it seems there
is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so
we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have
you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to
spend eternity."

"Really, I have made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the Yang
Berhormat

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules," says the angel.

And with that, the angel escorts him to the elevator and he goes down,
down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a
green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of
it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and dressed in the finest batik there is. They run
to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had
while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game
of golf and then indulge themselves on lobsters, caviar and the most
expensive food there is. Present together is the devil, who really is a
very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes.

They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to
go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator
rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where
the angel is waiting for him.

"Now it' s time to visit heaven."

So, 24 hours pass with the Yang Berhormat joining a group of contented
souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a
good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and the
angel returns.

"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose
your eternity."

The Yang Berhormat reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would
never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I
am better off in hell."

So the angel escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to
hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren
land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in
rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls
from above. The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his
shoulder.

"I don't understand," stammers the Yang Berhormat. "Yesterday I was here
and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar,
drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a
wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning,
just like you did during an election.... .. Today you voted."
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hafizazzim
hell blazer
hell blazer


Number of posts : 521
Location : one step only
Registration date : 13/08/2007

PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Sun Mar 09, 2008 7:30 pm

Malam Pertama Pasangan muda yang sama-sama masih perawan akhirnya
menikah.
Masing-masing gugup ketika menghadapi malam pertama, namun tidak
ada yang mau mengaku atau bertanya kepada pasangannya tentang apa yang
harus dilakukan.

Didera kebingungan, si pengantin lelaki bertanya kepada ayahnya
"Ayah, apa yang harus saya lakukan?"
"Telanjanglah dan naik ke tempat tidur", jawab ayahnya.

Kemudian ia melakukan apa yang disarankan ayahnya.
Si pengantin perempuan terperanjat setengah mati melihat kelakuan
suaminya, ia kemudian bertanya kepada ibunya.
"Telanjanglah dan ikutlah suamimu", saran ibunya.

Setelah perempuan itu telanjang dan berbaring beberapa lama, si
pengantin lelaki pergi ke luar bilik dan bertanya lagi kepada ayahnya,
"Apa lagi yang harus saya lakukan?" lalu ayahnya menjawab,
"Lihatlah tubuh isterimu. Kemudian masukkan bahagian tubuhmu yang
paling keras ke tempat isterimu kencing!"

Beberapa saat kemudian, giliran si pengantin perempuan bertanya
kepada ibunya.
"Apa yang harus saya lakukan?"
Ibunya balik bertanya, "Apa yang sedang dilakukan suamimu?"
Setengah mengeluh si pengantin perempuan berkata,
"Ia sedang membenamkan kepalanya ke dalam mangkuk tandas!"


p/s....wan jgn buat camni....
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PostSubject: Re: A Place To Smile and Laugh   Today at 1:38 am

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